I’m in ghost town, I don't know how I got here and I don't know anyone here, the only person that could be here is Mum, she died when my twin and I were 3, I'm not sure where to find her. I asked a few people but they said no. I walked up to a weird screen and I saw it right there, the answer I've been looking for, I tapped the screen and appeared my siblings and dad sitting in the waiting room at the hospital, I went into one of the rooms and there laid on the bed was me.
Tuesday, 7 November 2017
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Good Story Poppy, I liked how you left some suspense for the reader and some parts where the reader could use their imagination to think of what could be happening. But I think I was a little bit confusing and you need to add more detail. Maybe add like where she is, what screen did she tap to come up with that image?
ReplyDeleteI really liked your story! I especially liked how you hooked the reader in right until the end. Maybe next time you could add like where she is.
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