Sunday, 15 October 2017

Izzy 100WC T4W1

The 9th of March in 2012  Mr Wing reports, an old lady was going for her daily walk with her dog when she came across a murky lake she recalls. She saw out of the corner of her eye two feet floating up on the the lake's surface. The two feet was obviously a drowned body. Shocked and disgusted the lady urgently called the police force. The police have tracked the body a girl at the age of thirteen, who has been drowned in the lake for two  weeks finding her parents who thought she was on a school trip.
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5 comments:

  1. Mrs. Trivedi-Ziemba (Team 100)16 October 2017 at 10:49

    Izzy,

    Your story intrigues me. You have a mystery thriller in making. Now I would like to know why there was a breakdown of communication between school & home? What happened before the trip? How finding the young girl affected the old lady? Who was she?....

    Are you planning to develop this in a short story or full flagged novel? If so, you might wish to check in https://nanowrimo.org/dashboard. November is National Writing Month & joining a NaNoWriMo challenges everyone to write a 100,000 word novel during the month.

    I am looking forward to reading other submissions from you.

    Best wishes.

    Mrs. Trivedi-Ziemba


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  2. Anonymous17 October 2017 at 16:15

    To Izzy
    I like your writing and that you put the year and date in your writing.
    From Felicity

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  3. Anonymous17 October 2017 at 21:31

    Good job Izzy
    I liked the concept of it and how you used your imagination to write what happened. Next time look at your spacing, you spaced them like that.
    Natasha

    ReplyDelete
  4. Anonymous18 October 2017 at 22:48

    Good, but also horrific story. Next time just watch your full stops and spacing.

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  5. Anonymous29 October 2017 at 13:43

    I liked how you explained how the old lady found her and your words like recall, urgently and murky. maybe next time tell us more about how it happened. great story

    ReplyDelete

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